The End Of The World is Near: Antonio Vasile Cut His P*nis Off Because Of Busch Beer

Of course it’s from the Huffington Post:

Cops in Lorain, Ohio, were investigating a report of a man trespassing on railroad property Tuesday when they came upon Antonio Vasile, who had blood all over his hands and shorts, according to a police report sent to The Huffington Post.

Vasile told cops he had "just cut his penis off," the report said. When asked how he did it, Vasile said, "with an old rusty saw, but that didn't work so well so I used a broken bottle I found."

The officer then asked the only crucial question left: why? "Busch made me do it," was Vasile's response, according to the report.
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